A half hour before our wedding ended, my wife and I tried to sneak out. Our family and friends decorated our car, so there was no hiding our exit.
I feel bad when seeing couples staying afterwards to help clean up. It’s your day! Feel entitled to leave if possible, and if you want to. Go start life with your partner… consummate the marriage, reminisce about the day, get excited about the honeymoon; don’t start it by emptying trash cans.
Does your cocktail hour take place in three different rooms? Is your reception hall massive? Are you having a ceremony onsite too?
Let’s say all the above was true. Have you asked your DJ if they have enough speakers? If they don’t, he may decide to leave the bar area without music, or only cover half of the reception room. Or after the ceremony, you might see your DJ moving speakers from the ceremony room over to the reception area; it’s never good to mess around with the audio right before introductions are about to happen (too many things can go wrong while rushing and under-pressure).
Show your DJ where you’d like music to be, and ask them how many speakers they’ll be bringing.
Some grooms look so sharp, while others don’t.
Multiple things could be wrong:
Dress shirt becomes untucked (or was never fully tucked in to begin with)
Jacket, pants or shit is too big
Tie is too loose (not tied properly)
Tie or suit is out of fashion (chosen because it was on sale at Men’s Warehouse)
Ask yourself. Has my fiancé ever worn a suit before? In the past, men wore suits all the time. But if your wedding day is the first time he dons a tie, consider getting in some practice beforehand.
Have him try a few different suit styles so he’s comfortable in a slim-fit or tailored suit. Shop around to find a tie that’s newer looking than paisley. If you go, start dressing up for church during your engagement, or dress up for some fancy dates.
Dressing well takes time to learn what’s fashionable and find nice pieces that fit well. Don’t assume one visit to the college kid working at David’s Bridal will be enough. Spend time on this during your engagement.
Just ask your DJ, “Will you be sitting during the reception? Dinner is one thing, but if they’ll be sitting at any other point, find a new DJ.
Even if they’re using a Spotify playlist during cocktail hour, standing behind their booth will give off better party vibes. People will feel they’re being served better.
The worst is when I see a few DJ’s sitting together behind the booth, chatting and looking at their phones. Guests are right to think they don’t take your event seriously.
Your wedding is the world series, the super bowl, the big day. If I’m smart, my feet won’t hurt too bad after DJ’ing your wedding; but they often do. But remember you’re worth it!
It happens every wedding. Guests circle around and start to cheer on an energetic dancer showing off their dance moves. Finally out of energy, or out of moves, the dancer flees the middle of the circle leaving an empty hole. Hopefully someone else jumps in (or is lured in) so the fun can continue. This usually lasts about five dancers before no one else is willing to jump in. This is when the awkwardness sets in. Right before it starts to get weird, It’s important for the DJ to help close the circle either using the mic, or jumping onto the dance floor to help out the guests.
He was drunk! The bar wasn’t opened yet, and the ceremony was still one hour away. Where was he getting his alcohol from? He kept retrieving beers from the back of his truck.
What’s the problem here? Yes, he may be a distraction during the ceremony and reception, but also he’s a liability. The venue can get in big trouble if he drives drunk and kills someone; he may lie and say the venue served him and didn’t cut him off.
The bar tender noticed this man was drunk, and went out to confront him. “You need to stop, this venue could face financial ruin for your actions. You cannot be here if you’re going to act in this manner”.
The venue and bartender were absolutely right to do this. I suggest maybe putting some groomsmen or uncles in charge of keeping the peace if you know some guests may get out of hand.
Since I bought my ring off of Amazon for $14, I decided to get an extra one (one size bigger) in case I got fat. Fortunately I haven’t needed it yet.
I tested out a silver ring; it got scratched up immediately. Then I got a tungsten carbide ring from Amazon, and almost seven years later, it still looks new.
It’s just silly how much some things cost just because they’re associated with weddings. The ring doesn’t make me love my wife, but I will always wear it because I’ll love her till the day I die.
I moved to Ohio to be close to family. My wife grew up here. If 20 years from now, our children start families in a different state, we may move at that point. But until that happens, we’re staying put.
Ask your DJ what their future plans are. Sometimes Brides book DJ’s one to two years out. A lot can change in a person’s life. If they don’t have solid roots, they may be tempted to a different area for a fresh start and new opportunities.
Play a slow song by Elvis, here they come. Up out of their seats, they slowly descend to the dance floor.
It’s funny, a lot of the older people wait at their tables, watching the dance floor, just waiting for that slow song. This is why it’s important to play a slow song, and maybe some other music they’ll like earlier in the night. If you don’t tend to your older guests, they’ll get bored, and leave even earlier than they were planning. They’ll say things like, “I don’t know why the DJ didn’t play any slow songs”.
But if you play a few songs for the older crowd, they’ll be very grateful. Often, you’ll see some remain on the dance floor, even when the music picks back up to newer, faster songs.
Also buy your house in cash. Haha, it sounds like I’m joking, but this is what my wife and I did.
I’m going to put this out there, because no one else will tell you this. You can get out of debt faster than you thought possible. You can get rid of your credit cards. You can never have a car payment again. And you can live without regret that you just put your honeymoon on a credit card.
In my humble opinion, you don’t want to start out a marriage worried about money. But, many couples do. They let their wedding spending get out of control simply because it’s their big day, so they justify foolishness in their heads.
We as humans do this all the time, we convince ourselves it’s okay to do something that is actually harmful to ourselves; I do this everyday with cookies and beer.
Money is such a personal topic to people, maybe because of shame. It’s easy to look at Instagram and think everyone else must be doing great with money, “Why am I not?”
From personal experience, don’t try to impress others with a big wedding, a super nice car, and the biggest ring. Focus on serving others, smiling, and being so grateful for the life and family members you do have.
Does your DJ consider many guests may get upset if they’re not told the bar will close during dinner? Even last call, they would like to be informed. Some of them want to run over and grab two more drinks before they can’t any longer.
My wife was upset during my brother’s wedding because she was nursing and couldn’t get to the bar in time. She wasn’t getting drunk, she just wanted a little red wine.
Make sure your DJ always is considering your guests, what they want, and how they’re feeling.
You might feel weird asking others for money. Nowadays, some couples wait till they’re older to marry. They have worked and saved, and can take care of themselves. They’re not 19 with no savings and no plates.
In my experience, couples aren’t making that much money off the Money Dance (also called Dollar Dance). Realistically, it’s just a fun time to connect with each guest. You might have an aunt who’s slightly timid; she may want to talk with you, but not want to fight off the hoards of others preening for your attention. The Money Dance is a great time for her to connect with you one-on-one. That can mean a lot to some family members. When announcing this dance, I always focus on the connection aspect. “Come share a quick moment with the Bride and Groom”. Then it feels less tacky, and more about the connections and relationships.
Don’t get all your guests to kiss, just some of them.
The Kissing Game is a fun way to entertain guests during dinner.
The DJ calls for a couple to come up and do a kiss which the Bride and Groom then must replicate. Around four to six couples can be called during dinner, with around 10 minutes in between each.
If you’d like to do this at your wedding, give a list of couples to your DJ. Make sure to at least tell the first couple your plan so they’re on board and willing. Pick couples you know will have fun or be silly and enjoy!
I’d rather have a DJ with 1000 songs. Why? If a DJ had a fire at their house, they’d save their wife and kids first, and then their music.
It’s not hard to download 250,000 songs. I actually started out that way. I gathered every piece of music I could get my hands on.
It’s better for the DJ to gather a smaller, highly-curated list. They know these songs inside and out. They can quickly jump to best parts of the song, and skip over the boring parts. They find the best version of the song (there can easily be 20-30 DJ edits of popular songs), i.e. using a moombahton version of the song Milkshake always goes over well! The songs are properly categorized with beatgrids set (this allows music to sync up to light-shows). No person can do all this with 250,000 songs.
Understand, the above is true primarily when the DJ is mixing, mainly during the dance floor. I think it’s totally acceptable to build playlists using Spotify to play during ceremony seating, cocktail, and dinner (it still takes lots of time to curate this list).
As a DJ, I have no idea how to bustle a dress. I do know you’ll likely be fumbling around with it while your bridal party waits to be introduced into the reception.
I would suggest having a specific person who practices the bustle beforehand. This may sound silly, but I’ll often see the mom, Maid of Honor, and an aunt struggling to do this.
Also, have a planned time to do it. You may have a DJ who’s not aware your dress needs bustled. I wish I knew this on my wedding day. The DJ announced our first dance, and my wife’s dress wasn’t bustled yet. She did her best to dance with me, but it wasn’t the easiest.
When you did a taste testing, they probably didn’t overcook the chicken and it tasted great. But when they cook for 200 people, the meat tends to be overdone.
This is why BBQ sauce is so helpful, it covers the dryness of any overcooked meat. Did you ever get a plated meal at a wedding and wish they added more sauce to the plate?
With plated meals, they need to be kept warm while the staff runs back and forth. Plus, maybe the meat sat on a plate while the potatoes were finishing up. All this leads to dry meat. BBQ on the other hand gets cooked in big batches and just marinates in juice.
Yes, some plated meals can be great, but also consider BBQ is usually cheaper and all the sauce options are fun. And with BBQ, guests can enjoy seconds!
A DJ I respected plugged every piece of equipment into one circuit. He was going over-the-top, wanting to give the Bride and Groom the best experience possible. Then it happened. During the height of dancing, the lights and music turned off. He tripped the breaker. Too much was plugged-in.
This happened over and over again until I suggested he split the load between two circuits. I helped him do it and everything was fine from that point out.
This was early-on in my DJ career; I was also going to school for Electrical Engineering Technology. Ever since then, I always do my best to ensure a breaker doesn’t need reset at a wedding. No music is the quickest way to kill a dance floor :)
Okay, it wasn’t an outhouse, but a Port-A-Potty.
Being in NE Ohio, I DJ many weddings at barns; some of them don’t have bathrooms! Yes, this is rare, but you should double check.
A good bathroom provides many benefits to your guests. They’ll have a place to freshen up and make sure they look great. Some might get sick from drinking too much; having a dedicated stall in helpful. Parents may need an area to change their child’s diapers. And you can put a nice basket of breath mints and Aspirin for the guests.
Providing guests a small Port-A-Potty simply isn’t the right way to go. It’s small, not temperature controlled, smelly, and often dark once the sun goes down. There are vehicles that provide nice portable bathrooms. These are bigger, offer power, and are sometimes temperature controlled.
My wife, Megan, only had one requirement for our wedding reception, no drop ceilings. Fortunately I found a beautiful VFW venue that worked-out great.
Being a wedding DJ, I’ve been to many extravagant venues where the walls and floors are made of marble. Yes, they’re more beautiful, but the sound can suffer in these environments.
Sound bounces off hard surfaces so large marble rooms sound like echo chambers. Have you ever been inside a Cathedral? They’re usually made of stone and marble; it’s always hard to understand what the priest is saying.
Just remember soft materials like carpet or drop ceiling absorb sound, letting the music and toasts sound much clearer.
If a table full of vendors are given a sandwich tray, you may have problems.
Vendors work very long days and are going non-stop. They may bring snacks, but after a long day of work, a quick hot meal can give them a needed boost.
I’ve seen vendors forced to hide in the back and eat bologna sandwiches. They will talk and joke about the food. Their focus changes from YOU to themselves. This is no good. Your wedding day is the Super Bowl and you deserve the best.
I personally think it’s okay for you to skip vendor meals all together; you pay so much for food as it is. It’s simply a wonderful gesture when you do. Whether or not you serve me food doesn’t affect my goal of serving you the best I can. Just be aware some vendors may not see it that way.
